Wednesday, April 1, 2009


Well, I recently did something extremely foolish...
I Accidentally lit my hand on fire....
So, it still hurts, and it's all disgusting. [Further Details If Inquired]

Also, I apologize for not actually posting anything in a while. Sorry.

I do in fact have a story for you all!! It's my plotline for an educational "B-Movie". I hope you like it:

The Attack of the 50 Foot Tall Protists
& the Killer Fungi

In a graveyard, a mushroom came out from the ground, above a grave. But, these were no ordinary circumstances; this was the grave of a victim of the Chernobyl Incident. The underground Hyphae had already absorbed the radioactive poison, and the Fungus was planning on spreading it.
Meanwhile, in the blistering cold of Canada’s Northwest Territories, a research lab was shattered, as a 50 foot tall Paramecium broke through the walls, its pellicle couldn’t bend anymore. It was followed by a 50 foot tall Amoeba, and a 90 foot tall Euglena (Counting the Flagellum). These Giant protists found the nearest water source, the Arctic Ocean, and they began to move toward warmth.
Back in Russia, the Radioactive Spores had been spread, and inadvertently been brought into St. Petersburg. The citizens had no idea what hit them. The Fungi had developed a craving for human flash, which the radioactive mutations had helped it evolve to meet this, rapidly. Some spores landed on the ground, but others, landed on humans. At first, when people started dying en masse, the Russian Authority believed that it was an outbreak of a disease. But when the first body was brought in for an autopsy, doctors found the body was filled with hair like threads, and there were no bacteria to be found in the body. The Fungi had effectively killed all other competitors for the body. The doctors realized that it was no disease they were dealing with, it was a pandemic, of Fungi.
The Protists began to swim towards warmth, and inevitably ended up off the coast of California. The Paramecium had arrived two days before the other protists, thanks in part to its Cilia, allowing it to swim upwards of 30 mph. The Protists, while all arriving in different locations, began to hunger, and launched their onslaught on the nearby cities. The Paramecium ravaged San Diego, the Amoeba, Los Angeles. And the sharks in San Francisco harbor were no match for this massive invader. There was a reign of terror in Southern California.
People were dying by the thousands. Martial Law was declared, but nothing could stop the spread of this fungi. The Army was called in. Luckily for the Russians, they had spent the Cold War planning to fight in a Nuclear Wasteland, St. Petersburg matched that description. The Soldiers pulled out anyone that had escaped the fungi, being forced to leave those that hadn’t. They created a barrier, and began to pour salt all over the city, and drain it of water. The fungus would quickly begin to die of dehydration. High intensity lights were also added from every possible angle, knowing that fungi prefer the dark.
In San Diego, the National Guard was fighting the Giant Paramecium, but to no avail. It seemed to outwit their tactics, and it had two nuclei to function with. The Guard opened fire, aiming for the Macro Nucleus. The Macro Nucleus was destroyed, but the Paramecium was still alive. Though, in a trance-like state, it wasn’t dead. The Micro Nucleus was still intact. Suddenly, the Paramecium launched itself forward, and soldiers standing in the wrong place found themselves in the Paramecium’s oral groove, and were deposited in the gullet. It was a truly disheartening sight to see your fellow soldiers being digested through the translucent cytoplasm and vacuole of the protist. The Guard had an idea. Strapping explosive charges together, they threw them into the oral groove. The miniature cilia moved the explosives down, into the gullet, which deposited them in the Food Vacuole. The explosive were detonated. This ruptured the Pellicle and the Cell Membrane. Cytoplasm spewed out of the shell, carrying out the two contractile vacuoles and the small nucleus.
Los Angeles hadn’t gotten federal support yet, and the Giant Amoeba was going downtown. Citizens tried to flee, but were grabbed by tentacle-like pseudopods, and metabolized. Conventional tactics of attack didn’t work on the Amoeba, its shape was changing constantly, and it could take a hit with little to no damage. The residents of Los Angeles began to think up a plan. They lured the giant Amoeba into a construction site. They swung the crane’s hook into the Amoeba and smashed its contractile vacuole. The Amoeba began to expand, to the breaking point. Much like in San Diego, cytoplasm covered everything in sight. But the menace was gone.
St. Petersburg had been saved, but almost two thirds of its population was decimated by the killer fungi. Clean up efforts were going on, making sure that every hyphae was destroyed.
In the San Francisco Bay, there’s an urban legend of a giant Euglena; being able to produce its own food, but also hunting sharks, and people, for food. They say that if you see its eyespot, it’s too late, and that you’ll be caught by a whip like flagellate, and consumed.

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